Too much

I realised that my last entry was dated 09/12/2007. That's...about a week ago! Don't worry. It's not that my life has gone boring. Instead the opposite is true. It's very...can't grasp a word for it!

For the whole week, there has been nothing but drama and excitement coupled with funky and crazy happenings that made me live. There were way too much that happened. Way too much.

For one, I confessed to Benji about how I felt about him. I was transparent about the issue that's gnawing me. One which I can only tell others this much. I didn't know what I was doing rather yet it felt apt and right. And proper. Benji if you're reading this, you know what I'm talking about.

And the reason behind me telling Benji has got something to do with what happened in camp. Something life-changing; and instilled so much fear in me. Fear of losing a friend. It was surreal and traumatising. If what I had pictured in mind trully happened, I'd be lying in bed. Fate has a funny way of giving you a wake up call. If what I had imagined had happened, I'd lost Kent. Like lose him cause he...I shan't say it. It's so fucking painful, so painful to have it in mind. And I shan't wrte it either for fear of it coming true. My heart literally stop for two beats when I first heard the news. I really thought and believe I'd lost kent: my confidant and buddy. A true buddy. I think I would have died spiritually. This is so melodramatic but try to think about it in this line: you lost your dad to a road accident. How'd you feel? Take the pain and grief and concentrate it to one part of your heart. It is akin to that feeling.

Just now Shai had a post-production party. It was fun, meeting people whom you've not seen for a few weeks. We camwhored and ate and caught up with things. Too many to talk about but my eyes are too droopy.

So it's heading to bed for me. Yourself? Where are you heading off to? Whichever way, just be careful. Never underestimate safety. NEVER! Cause if you do, you'll LITERALLY LOSE someone that you care for so much. Till then...

Love ya'll