Monday, 23 April 2007

Hrmmph let me see what I did yesterday. Oh yes...

In the afternoon I had a chat with Manu. He's a "prepare-quotations-for-expositions" french ( I don't know his profession you see and neither does he, at least what it is called in English). It started out decent. Then it decended to the realm of kinkiness where wank and cum form a major part of the topic. He has a webcam thus I can see how he looks like. The first time I saw his picture he looks like the lead singer of Coldplay. No kidding. Serious. So that would make Manu cute, hot and sexy. It went heavier and out of hand and you are not to be let in on what happened. It's personal.

Then Izyan, aka Izzy, called (spoiler- hehe). She wanted to go out. It was about to rain so I said,"Maybe some other day." She said that she can't. And me being bored and drama that I've got no more friends already (read my previous entry) went ahead with whatever plan there was. The initial idea was to watch a movie at GV Plaza. Then because I wasn't in a mood to travel that far, we went Tampines instead (as usual). Had dinner with her at this small store then off to the cinemas. If Izzy had come earlier we could have watched the 5pm show at Century Cineplex whereby we pay $8.50 for the tickets instead of $9.50 at GV Tampines which was where we watched Fracture by the way.

I personally think that it is a good movie. If the writers, director and producers had pushed the story a little more, it would have been brilliant. I would say that Fracture would be catapulted to the same league as The Da Vinci Code. Nevertheless, having a cute character, Ted, played by Anthony Hopkins, who allegedly shot his wife and a cute looking lawyer, with a boyish look, eager to switch his career from criminal law to corporate law, Willy, played by Ryan Gosling, that he became complacent and practically weaved himself into the labyrinthine situation and the lack of sex/intimate kissing scenes being complemented by many significant subtle hints and imageries make me feel good paying $9.50 for it. Of course I would pay $6.50 (at Cathay) or $7.00 (at GV) for it not because it lacks that quality but simply because it's like shopping at TopMan when there's a discount. It's twice better!

When I reached home it was about 9pm. I went online after taking a shower. I checked my email and saw this message from someone whom I don't know. He looks good and he wants to be friends. He gave his msn email and the next thing I know we were chatting like friends who have known each other before. Benji is a sweet guy. He's a teacher at the Australian International School, so that makes him an Aussie who earns more than our local teachers. I said that I too wanted to be a teacher in an international school then but I can't because they hire only foreigners. He travels a lot. He just came back from Europe last week and tomorrow he is going off to Malaysia and Thailand for a week. And before that he went somewhere lah. Well I guess if you have 13 weeks of holiday you too would wanna travel extensively. =)

I don't know if I can fall for Benji. He is nice and seems like a good person but that is what I got from my first impression of him. I remembered this person from Otis, where I had worked for a week in March, who said that unless you are married to the person and you live with the person under the same roof, you will not know about the truth of his/her characters. He said this to me and my female colleague. Still, I think it would be foolish of me to not accept this kind person into my life simply because I am afraid. Ironically, being afraid is a good sign. It means that I am moving on to something else that I am new to. Thus explains the queasiness I get when I chat with him. It was this message of his that I first became nervous: so are you looking for a bf or you just wanna have fun? I am afraid but I would like to take that step. Is this how it feels when some of you guys first get into a relationship?

But Benji and I are not together, yet. It will take a few months before we would first meet because of our timetable. I mean, I have this adorable man who is willing to wait for me and asks me to trust him even before we are together. I think he is serious. Not that I am not. It's just that it's something new I guess and because good things happen too fast I guess I'm feeling afraid maybe because I feel it's a bit of a rush. I do wanna try this life in a relationship thing and I am willing to give appropriate amount of whatever is needed to make it work. I am 19 (soon) and I think I have to break this shell and move away from this comfort zone that I have placed my ass on for a long time. I wanna bf but when he appears I feel like running away! Crazy right? Nevermind. Benji, we'll see how it goes. Please don't get the idea that I am not serious. Give me time to settle in and feel "comfortable" with you. I can't say that I love you because it's too early. But I can confidently say that I like you. =)

Love y'all.

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